I have no idea how old I am. No idea. Everyone should forget how old they are. It is the most liberating feeling one can imagine…except maybe buying milk in one’s underwears. That would be pretty liberating too.
Posts Tagged ‘aging’
It’s your fault. That’s right. It’s your fault we’re in this mess. Don’t go around blaming the older generation. This falls squarely on you. You are to blame. Rotten teenagers. It’s your fault we don’t have good movies anymore. And you know why?? Because your attention spans are the length of a gnat. A GNAT I SAY! [...]
I have discovered that I am becoming less and less of an extrovert as I become older. Perhaps maturity brings with it less of a need to be “cool” and fit in. Maybe I don’t have the time I once had to devote to being popular and extroverted. Or maybe I’m just being lazy. Young [...]
So what exactly IS cool?? And who or what dictates these things? Is there a committee that sits around a large table and one day decides to vote on making Justin Bieber and the Kardashians cool?? And if so, how did these people ever obtain such a lofty position of power? More importantly, how can [...]
I’m not that old… I’m not that old… I’m not that old… Last summer I was teaching a Photoshop/Digital Arts class in one of the local schools when I got particularly excited about the subject and exclaimed that the topic of what we were discussing was “rad.” The class started blankly at me for a [...]
I swear I was cool once. Honest. I wouldn’t lie about something like that. I really was cool once. I’m not exactly sure what caused my eventual decline from “Joe Cool” to “Joe Shmoe,” but somewhere along the line I seem to have dropped a few levels on the veritable guitar amp of coolness. Maybe [...]
This past week has been an interesting one for me. I sense changes coming in my future and I’m not entirely certain what to expect. Will it mean a new and fancy job? A change of venue? A new and ridiculously adorable relationship? A new twist in this season’s episodes of Castle?? I just don’t [...]
I’m stuck. I’m totally stuck. Not only is my future devoid of any kind of plan, but I can’t even think of anything clever or satirical to write under this comic strip. So I’m stuck in both the literal and the philosophical sense. I’m doubly stuck. Like a dinosaur caught in one of the La [...]
I know I’m not really dying. Not really. But I’m not going to be 29 much longer. And 29 is significant to me. For me, 29 is really really lucky. Kind of like the lucky underwear that you wear during the playoffs. Yeah, that’s right. I know about your lucky underwear. So I’m a little saddened this [...]
Planning is a critical part of any vacation. Without it, you could end up in a big city with nothing to do but go to the Justin Bieber concert. I’m not speaking from experience, that’s just one of the worst possible outcomes I could come up with.